The tongue, Mohamed Ghilan states in his podcast episode entitled Prohibitions of the tongue: Part 1 of 6, is like a bar. If a Muslim walks into a bar, they might be going to simply get a glass of water or soda. Or it could be that the company they work for decides to hold an important meeting there. Or maybe it’s the place of a gathering for their colleagues’ retirement party. There are, in fact, a few possible legitimate (or not completely forbidden) reasons one may go into a bar. Yet, unless unavoidable, a Muslim would not find themselves in a bar. Even if thirsty, the bar would be the last option we’d consider to get a glass of water. We avoid bars because we know that the overwhelming characteristic of bars and bar culture is that which is haram -drinking alcohol, dancing with strangers, and overall lewd activity.
In the same vein, speech (in all forms) poses a similar danger. The more we talk the more likely we are to engage in the wrong kind of speech. This, of course, isn’t absolute -we can train ourselves to avoid engaging in harmful speech, but it takes work and often does not come naturally. The more excessive our speech becomes, the more thoughtless we are about what we say.
When we think of the tongue, speech, it is helpful to hold the image of a bar in our mind. That is, we recognize the potential harm and remain cognizant of that harm to avoid falling into it. Just as we would tread with caution if we had to go into a bar, we should do the same when we speak. Let’s say we had no choice but to enter a bar to fulfill our thirst. We’d go in, look straight towards our destination (the counter), ask the waiter for a glass of water, watch as they pour it to make sure they use a clean glass -as we do not want traces of alcohol in our water, pay our money, avoid interactions with other bar attendees and leave swiftly.
We can think of speech in the same way. The bar is symbolic of speech, the waiter is our interlocutor, the bar attendees are all the possible options for harmful speech that we can fall into, the water is the pure speech we intend to engage in, the glass is the topic that can -if adulterated in any way, lead us into “lesser” forms of harmful speech, and our swift leaving is the ending of a conversation without engaging in excess. If we intend pure speech, avoid harmful speech, engage in a subject of benefit or at least one that is harmless, our interlocutor does not mistakenly adulterate the conversation, and if we leave swiftly, we have successfully abstained from harm.
But this is not an easy task. It takes effort, knowledge, and good intention. We can all start now, with good intentions for our speech; to speak that which is harmless or beneficial. Mohamed Ghilan’s episode series on Prohibitions of the Tongue or Seeker’s Guidance course Upright Speech: Birgivi on Holding One’s Tongue will both provide the knowledge to understand what encompasses harmful speech. The effort will be on each of us as Muslims to refine our speech through self-correction, self-awareness, and scrupulousness until it is like pure water; both harmless and beneficial.
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Mohamed Ghilan, Prohibitions of the Tongue: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mohamed-ghilan/id1093009815
Seeker’s Guidance, Upright Speech: Birgivi on Holding One’s Tongue: https://seekersguidance.org/courses/upright-speech-birgivi-on-holding-ones-tongue/
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Photo by Tobias Nii Kwatei Quartey on Unsplash
Consider picking up a copy of my book, 40 Hadith of ‘Aisha, An English collection of 40 Hadith narrated by the beloved wife, scholar, and sage ‘Aisha bint Abu Bakr, available here. Also, consider signing up for our monthly newsletter here: bythefigandtheolive.com/newsletter. For speaking engagements visit Nuriddeenknight.com
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