“Cover your hair when you pray,” I’ve wanted to say these six words to women many times over the years but with a small sigh of despair, I often do not. We all have various levels of modesty at different times in our life. Especially in the West, it can often be difficult to maintain the ideal level of modesty required in Islam. But, in prayer, where only worshipping our Lord should matter, where style and the judgment of others do not, it should be the easiest place to cover up for the sake of God. And it is particularly crucial in salah because being covered properly is a part of the validity of our salah, having our bodies exposed when we have the ability to cover invalidates our prayer. Yet something so technical still hits a sore spot with women who have been conditioned to view their clothing choices as a part of their freedom and identity.
We’ve been taught that no one has the right to tell us how to dress, how to look and what to wear. And one who does is seeking to control us, to harm us. While there is some merit to this —men and society at large often do seek to control women’s dress for nefarious purposes, at what point do we put aside the battle of egos and submit to our Lord? Would it be so hard to draw our hijab a bit closer when praying in order to seek our Lord’s pleasure —not our own nor in obedience to any man?
The nakedness of a woman, in prayer, is the entire body except the face and hands —Safinah Al Najah, A Primer in Shafi Fiqh
Yet because our knowledge is so lacking of even the basics I don’t believe most women know that proper coverage is a part of the validity of prayer. I think, that for some of us, we’ve become so comfortable with our disobedience (even if slight) we forget it’s in fact disobedience. I recall years ago seeing a woman who didn’t wear hijab pull a scarf out of her bag and drape it across her head when it was time for prayer. She, I assume, was at least aware that hijab was obligatory. But for the many women who aren’t aware that covering everything but the hands and face is an obligation telling them to simply cover their hair when they pray seems like a personal attack.
There’s a nuance that I believe must be maintained when it comes to women’s modesty. It is hard to attain the Islamic ideal and obligation of modesty in the West (though Western influence being so global the same is increasingly true elsewhere). As women need to have mercy on ourselves and be given mercy when we don’t reach that standard. But there is no excuse and no offense to be taken when we are reminded to cover completely in our prayers. We pray our prayers are accepted and rewarded by God but we should at the very least want them to be valid. As for myself, I will probably continue to refrain from telling women to cover up during prayer, essentially because we are not charged with “encouraging the right and forbidding the wrong,” if we don’t believe it will work. I once saw a male shuyukh corner a young Muslim woman who donned a turban during prayer, he held a copy of Reliance of the Traveller in his hands and told her that she needed to be fully covered during prayer and that he’d be happy to open the book and show her the ruling, I cringed. Her discomfort was palpable and his approach was questionable. Had I been the one to approach her I don’t doubt I would have been gentler and more merciful but I have no idea if that approach would have conveyed the necessary gravity. We need to teach basic fiqh in our Masajid, we need to learn our basic obligations and we as women need to divorce the political (“My body my rights”) from the spiritual (worshipping God as he wants to be worshipped).
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Side Note: A practical point, for convenience women who don’t fully cover (everything except hands and face) should keep a prayer dress and/or scarf on them to wear during prayer, like this, Masajid and Islamic centers should also keep these items handy.
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Photo by Damon Zaidmus on Unsplash
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“As for myself, I will probably continue to refrain from telling women to cover up during prayer, essentially because we are not charged with “encouraging the right and forbidding the wrong,” if we don’t believe it will work.” I’ve never heard this before… I love it and it totally makes sense.. but it also speaks to the effectiveness of the message, messenger, and outcome.. not just being self-righteous. this is in tune w the spirit and beauty of our deen. jazakAllah for sharing.